Rach has ended things although only on a temporary basis, I am devastated and it s difficult to cope. I understand why she has done it and what she wants to get out of the situation but it hurts not to call her my girlfriend. Right now it is difficult to put aside feelings of dread ad abandonment and I am on the edge of tears all the time. Sometimes I just want to hug her and give her a kiss, other times I can't believe that she has done it.
I know I can cope with her taking her independence back, it is something that needs to happen, what I am struggling with is not even having the option to be hers. I can't bring myself to tell my mum as I know it will break her heart even more than it has done mine.
What do I do? Gina says I have to patient and I know this is the write thing. Ultimately Rach will be a happier stronger person coming out of this and that can only be a good thing. Until then though I just have to struggle on. She still wears my ring and I never want that to stop.
I am always going to be hers and I will be waiting on the other side for her. It would kill me to see her go and find someone else and I think this is the thing I am most scared of. I know she loves me and won't ever stop loving me but what after the independence, she doesn't want me?
Its a stupid little thought that won't go away
I love her
x
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